The Myth of Willpower: Why Restriction Doesn’t Work
- Maja Kazazic
- Jan 29
- 2 min read
For years, I believed that willpower was the key to success—whether it was weight loss, career growth, or self-improvement. I thought if I just had more discipline, more control, more willpower, I could achieve anything.
But after working with countless patients and reflecting on my own journey, I’ve realized something profound: Willpower alone is not the answer. In fact, the more we rely on restriction and self-denial, the more we set ourselves up for failure.
Why Willpower Alone Fails
Many of us believe that success—whether it’s in diet, career, or life—is about resisting temptation. We tell ourselves:
❌ “I just need to be stronger.”
❌ “If I had more willpower, I’d reach my goal.”
❌ “I should be able to just say no.”
But here’s the truth: Willpower is a limited resource. Studies show that the more we rely on it, the faster it depletes. That’s why by the end of a long, stressful day, we cave into cravings, distractions, or behaviors we swore we’d avoid. It’s not because we’re weak—it’s because willpower alone isn’t a sustainable strategy.
What Works Instead: A Science-Backed Approach
Instead of relying on sheer willpower, we need to shift our focus to alignment, intention, and self-compassion. Here’s how:
1️⃣ Understand Your WHY – When you focus on why a goal matters, you create intrinsic motivation. Instead of saying, “I shouldn’t eat that,” reframe it as, “I want to nourish my body so I feel my best.”
2️⃣ Make It Easier to Succeed – Instead of resisting temptation all day, design your environment for success. If you want to eat better, stock your kitchen with foods that fuel you. If you want to read more, put books where you’ll see them.
3️⃣ Practice Self-Compassion, Not Self-Criticism – Beating yourself up doesn’t lead to better outcomes. In Hungry for More, I explore how self-compassion is actually a more effective motivator than shame. When we treat ourselves with kindness, we are more likely to make sustainable, healthy choices.
Why This Matters
When we stop relying on willpower and start focusing on alignment, habits, and self-compassion, we free ourselves from the exhausting cycle of restriction and failure.
True change doesn’t come from deprivation—it comes from understanding, intention, and sustainable choices.
Final Thoughts: Focus on What Fulfills You
If you’ve been relying on willpower and feeling stuck, I encourage you to take a different approach. Instead of forcing yourself to “be stronger,” ask yourself:
💭 “How can I make this easier and more fulfilling?”
That shift in mindset makes all the difference.
🔥 As a keynote speaker, I love helping organizations and individuals break free from the myth of willpower and create lasting, meaningful change. If you’re ready to explore this further, let’s connect!
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